Here are a few awesome little details that they always forget to teach or talk about during Sunday services. The list of absurdities in the Bible seems endless, but here are a few of my faves.


Throwing kids on rocks will make you happy.
Psalm 137:9

Women love guys with the donkey nuts and horse jizz.
Ezekial 23:20

Selling your daughter into slavery is cool.
Exodus 21:7

You’re allowed to own a slave, but it’s gotta be from another country.

Leviticus 25:44

Killing someone is alright as long as they’re at their job on Sunday.

Exodus 35:2

You’re an evil person for trimming your beard or sideburns.

Leviticus 19:27

Boiling and Eating your son is OK, but your friend might not return the favor.
2 Kings 6:28-29

Tell a woman her hair resembles a bunch of goats.
Song of Solomon 6:5